Comments on: The Price I’ve Paid For Being Poor

By: Debbie

Debbie — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 14:14:34 +0000

It’s all about perspective, Sean. We’ve had to live on pretty tight budgets for most of our 32 years of marriage. With three boys and one income for most of the time you were growing up, money was not plentiful. However, we tried to live within our means. I hope that in spite of the fact that we lived rather modestly, you felt mostly happy and well cared for. There was always plenty of food (even if sometimes the soda was generic), clothing (though we had to get stuff on sale), a secure and safe home (not a mansion, but adequate for our needs), and reliable cars to drive (those minivans and other second hand cars were a blessing). Though we spent many vacations in Florida with relatives, we still had the opportunity to go and do things many of your friends envied. I know you remember sometimes you and your brothers had to eat out on $3.33 a piece, because I only had ten dollars to splurge with (and I usually just got a soda because that’s all I could afford). But, you became analytical at at how to make the most of it! Due to our limited allowance system, you became creative in many ways when it came to earning money, which give us some memorable stories about “Sean in the making”.
I hope you will embrace this period of struggling as a learning opportunity to set the priorities you will have in the future with your own family. In a few years when things are more financially stable, you will remember the lean times, but will realize it could have been much worse. You will also be a wiser consumer and think more seriously about friviolous purchases.
I am so proud of you, and how you have dedicated yourself to making the necessary sacrifices to acheive your goals. It know it’s not easy, but believe it or not, fulfilling your educational goals will mean more to you than all the material things you’ve sold on ebay. That’s something you can’t lose in a fire, have stolen, or sell…it’s a personal achievement that no material possession will ever be able to compete with in making you feel worthy and confident in the years to come. Stay the course (no pun intended), and keep focused. We’re here if you need us. :O) —mom

By: SeanJJordan

SeanJJordan — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 17:34:26 +0000

I’ll admit, when I posted that article, I was a bit on the emotional side. But hey, I like to try to learn from past mistakes, and the five points I posted are really good things for me to keep in mind down the road.

I tend to look at it as a sacrifice — I have to go through this now because I’m trying to score a better life (and income) for us later. And I’m not nearly as poor now as I was when in 2002, when I was living on ramen noodles and peanut butter and working 3 part time jobs.

But yeah, it sucks when you realize that your stuff has been contributing to your feeling of self-worth. Which begs the question… is it possible to live well and not be defined by what you own?

By: Katie

Katie — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 17:16:16 +0000

Sean… I had no idea this sort of thing was going on. I’m so sorry, but is that the right thing to say?

I’m incredibly sentimental about things I own, even dumb things with no monetary value at all — scraps of paper with notes on them from my family or friends, those old flyers for the parties we’d have at EB Games, price tag stickers off things I’ve bought. I think I’ve grown to believe that somehow by removing these items from my life, I’m removing PARTS of my life; that without those trinkets and bits of paper around to remind me of what’s in the past, I won’t remember. And maybe that’s true, of some things. Maybe it takes a torn piece of notebook paper to remind you of a specific incident, but I’m definitely a slave to my stuff.

Agreed with Jason on the Fight Club line. I actually listen to that one remixed song whenever I want to feel stronger about life in general, to stop focusing on things that don’t matter and stay fixated on what does. But where am I right now? At the moment, I’m incredibly angry and resentful that someone else on eBay is outbidding me on a Revolver Ocelot action figure. Isn’t that ridiculous? It’s not like I NEED the thing, but I WANT it, and those two become confused so, so often…

I don’t know what to tell you, really. I guess just know that I feel the same way about hoarding things. Honestly, the only way I’ve survived on my own to this point was largely by using up money in my savings account, money that my parents put away for me. I’d like to think that when I get a non-retail job I’ll be making more money and be better about spending it, but time and again for many people that doesn’t seem to be the case.

Maybe I need to hit rock bottom before I can see the way to climb back up.

Best of luck with everything. Call me anytime, okay?

By: Jason maranto

Jason maranto — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 20:57:42 +0000

I know the feeling the last 5 years have been nearly non-existent with the gallery and now establishing myself as a freelancer again — I’ve just gotten used to not spending any money at all… don’t miss it much at this point either.

Fight Club which is probably my favorite movie has a line in it that goes something like “we work jobs we don’t like to buy stuff we don’t need.”

I think that sums up the American way these days — I know I’ve broken those habits, but I sold the stuff that had any value a long long time ago. I think I’m better off for the experiences, maybe you will be too.

Best,
Jason.

By: Aaron Wakling

Aaron Wakling — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 06:15:21 +0000

Just wanted to say HI. I found your blog a few days ago on Technorati and have been reading it over the past few days.